Lemon Aid: Eleanorr1gby's Guide to Writing Successful Lemons

Lemon Aid

Eleanorr1gby's Guide to Writing Successful Lemons
By: @Eleanorr1bgy

Writing sex scenes for fanfiction (or lemons, as they're popularly

called) can be a bit of a challenge for the unseasoned writer. One

always runs the risk of going too far, or not going far enough. The

truth is, with every “lemon” you write, you become better and better

at it, but there are a few hard and fast rules one must follow.

Rule Number 1: Just because you're a virgin, it doesn't mean you can't

write a sex scene.

If you have a vivid enough imagination to even sit down and write any

sort of fiction, then that imagination will serve you well enough to

pull off a believable sex scene (assuming, of course, you follow the

rest of the rules). If you really find yourself stuck, a good way to

get past this and get the creative juices flowing would be by watching

a few movies that have really good love scenes in them. Personally, I

recommend The Notebook, The Blue Lagoon, Cruel Intentions, Dirty

Dancing, and Shakespeare in Love, for starters. They have some really

epic love scenes that will definitely give you a jump on starting that

dirty imagination.

Rule Number 2: There is a lot more to sex scenes than giving a play-by-play.

I don't really know anything from a man's perspective, but from a

woman's perspective, the brain does not shut down during sex. There's

a lot going on behind the scenes. Accurate descriptions of what's

going on are good, but too much focus on that and it becomes dull and

mechanical. If you really want to make a love scene GREAT, you should

also focus on what the characters FEEL and THINK, and not just what

they're doing.

Rule Number 3: Choose your words wisely.

What you choose to call certain anatomy is almost as important as what

you choose to do with said anatomy. One wrong slang word can render

the entire scene cheap and meaningless. In the other direction, using

clincal terms can also send you on the road to disaster. In my

experience, it's best to use vaguely descriptive words. Words like

“manhood”, “womanhood” “sex” (referring to a body part, not the act)

and the like are okay. “Vag”, “pussy”, and my god, the dreaded

c-word...are NOT.

The one exception to this rule is writing from a male character's

point of view. Guys are naturally a little bit more crude than girls

for the most part, so it's generally acceptable to have a guy refer to

his own parts in a less refined manner. This goes for  boy parts only.

In my opinion, using slang terms for female anatomy usually produces a

cringe-worthy result.

Rule Number 4: Proper Functions and Realism!!!

This is one of my biggest irks when it comes to sex scenes. I can't

tell you how many people just seem to be absolutely clueless when it

comes to anatomy of the human body. One more than one occasion I have

read sentences similar to this:

“He shoved his manhood into her clit, and she moaned.”

Um, what? That's kind of...physically impossible. It not only screams

“inexperienced”, but also “I totally failed 7th grade Sex Ed”. If

you're gonna have your characters doing things with body parts, you

better make damn sure you know what that body part is, what it's for,

and physical limitations, i.e. your male character will probably NOT

have a 12 inch penis, women do not have prostates, and nothing can be

shoved inside a clitoris.

Rule Number 5: If your characters do anything out of the ordinary,

you'd better have an explanation or a back story to cover this.

The internet is a vast cornucopia of knowledge that will expose one to

some of the most outrageous sexual predilections known to man, but

that doesn't mean you should use them, unless you can come up with a

plausible explanation as to why.

For example, in the first Ballad of Sam and Freddie, a prevailing

theme in the story focuses on the fact that Sam and Freddie have a

tendency to get a little too rough with each other in the sack. I did

this for a reason. Most of it was because on the actual show iCarly,

those two have been poking, prodding, insulting, and messing with each

other for years. It gave me a good jumping off point, but I wanted to

go deeper and expand it a little bit. The show gives off hints and

clues that Sam comes from an abusive or neglectful home, and Freddie

is a bit of a sheltered mama's boy who rarely gets the chance to feel

capable, responsible, or in charge.

Instantly, I now have a case for Sam having an issue with

vulnerability, and Freddie having a control issue. Put the two

together, and we can have some really interesting sex scenes that

serve not only as entertainment, but a way to explain the character's

issues and give them a method to deal with it. Freddie can force Sam

into being vulnerable to show her that he's not going to hurt her, and

Sam can allow Freddie to be in control so he doesn't feel so weak and

helpless. Find a way to weave a personal issue of a character's into

their sex life, and you now have a compelling scene that can be used

as a vehicle to further the story, instead of just something to fill

up space or pull in more readers.

Rule Number Six: Practice, Practice, Practice!

Your first lemon will probably suck. That's pretty much a fact. You

will revise it a hundred times, maybe even start over from scratch,

but don't give up! Read other stories for ideas, but careful about

stealing other writer's style and “turn of phrase”. It's annoying, and

doesn't help you grow as a writer. What does help is PRACTICE!!!

Just keep it up, and before long you'll be a regular Danielle Steele

of your chosen fandom.

I hope this has been informative and somewhat helpful. Happy writing!




To see these tips at work, take a look at 'The Ballad of Sam and Freddie' on Fanfiction.net
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7249118/1/The_Ballad_of_Sam_and_Freddie